with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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