Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
