omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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