the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
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