did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
