my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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