I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
