I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
