I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
