Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
a search helicopter?!
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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