My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
