Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
not ubering you a puppy
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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