thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
