She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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