And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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