sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
