i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
