just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
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