She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
