I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
