he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
