now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
