and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
