If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
