just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
