When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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