You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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