It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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