oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
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