I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
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