How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize
