Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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