im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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