you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
