New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
