i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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