He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
This is not my ceiling
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
