Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Randomize
