Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
