i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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