ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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