Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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