12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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