he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Randomize
