I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
