I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
he was CRYING into my vagina
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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