Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
