Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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