Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
