I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
